THE BLING RING

This is defiantly one of my favorite topics of discussion lately. Yes, even though the movie release date was June, 21, 2013 and the Hollywood burglaries were reported in 2011. Fuck it, drama doesn't die that fast. Especially when I'm addicted to shitty reality TV. I hit the jackpot a couple weeks ago when I came across Pretty Wild on Netflix. Halfway into the new episode and a rum & coke later, Alexis Neiers, gets arrested for involvement in the "Bling Ring" burglaries. SCOREEE! My roomie and I were hooked instantly. 

Alexis Neiers is a fucking idiot. Her desire for fame is hilarious. Hello bitch, you robbed Paris Hilton and climbed through a doggy door to steal a purse. Gross. She still continues to claim not guilty of any charges and has since become pregnant, super classy.

Everyone involved in these burglaries are delusional and clearly don't own mirrors. 

Unfortunately I have yet to see Sofia Coppola's film, The Bling Ring, but I look foward to watching it immediately on the DVD release date, 9/17. RedBox is my bitch. So yeah don't try to rob rich celebrities because you will fail and end up in a jail cell next to Lindsay Lohan. She'll cut you for cocaine, don't do it. 

SHARK WEEK

// SHARK WEEK IS FOR BETCHES //  

The most wonderful time of the year. Just not for seals.

 Who the hell doesn't watch Shark Week?! If you're reading this and you don't, we will never be friends. This is literally the only time of the year I care to watch cable. Get comf on the couch with your betches and snack on while sharks go cray in the big blue ocean. It'd be like watching 2-Chainz and Lil Wayne doing a performance on crack at Sea World -what kid wouldn't fucking run screaming?! It's extremely entertaining to say the least.

Due to the fact that I thoroughly enjoy Shark Week and fashion -I created my vision of Shark Style below.

Topshop / Maxandchloe / Nars

Mix in some sweet treats & alcohol and you won't ever regret the 168 hours you're about to sacrifice.

ESSIE F A L L 2013

FOR THE TWILL OF IT COLLECTION

• For the Twill of it - Multi grey/teal metallic base. Pink, purple & green flash mix.                                  
• Vested Interest -  Sage green base with grey/blue undertones, creme like.                                            
• Cashmere Bathrobe - Grey base with blue undertones and fine silver shimmer bits.                               
• Twin Sweater Set - Crimson red base with blue undertones. High gloss color.                                         
• The Lace is On - Magenta/Fuchsia base with fine shimmer bits. Jelly like.                                             
• After School Boy Blazer - Midnight navy blue. Jelly like, super shine finish.                                    

Essie continues to surprise me with this fabulous collection of colors. 

They completely capture the essence of fall from any perspective. Seriously these colors scream it's fall betch, buy me! For the Twill of it is like the perfect combo of fall at a party in a tiny little bottle. It's the small shit like this that gets me way too excited for this season to already be over. Waiting for nail polish collections to hit stores so I can go sweater shopping and start drinking hot tea. Pfttt my whole life changes after Essie launches their new collection. Okay kidding, but like only halfway. Just keep an eye peeled betches because your nails are just as important as your last outfit choice. 

DAVIDsTEA

I have recently become obsessed with tea. Before this, I was an extreme coffee addict. With very scarce options where I currently live -I made the switch. A friend of mine from Canada introduced DavidsTea to me. Holy shit. Like holy effin shit. Clearly I've been living under a rock. Last night she gave me the site and told me to pick a few that I'd like to try. It's next to impossible to pick a "few", but I like surprises. Especially from other countries. 

Pink Lemonade / Birthday Cake / Coconut Grove / Bollywood Chai / Movie Night 

Those are just to name a few. There's 8 different sections of teas. All made with the betchiest ingredients ever. Fucking sprinkles and popcorn. This is real life and I'm ashamed that I am just discovering this. If you're a next level tea betch, feel free to enlighten me. Comment with your favorite flavors or whatever the hell taste deliciously awesome. For all you betches that are on the same page as me, enjoy. Davidstea.com

SICK SAD WORLD

 

In a world full of simple bitches. Sometimes all you can do is stand back, drink coffee, and talk shit.

It truly is a sick sad world... for everyone else. Betches be like, "ain't nobody got time for that." 

ICE ICE BABY

This totally screams White Witch. You know, that super bitch who kills Aslan in Chronicles of Narnia? Yeah her. At least she introduced herself as the queen. She's like a borderline betch. 

Anyways.

Gold really needs to take a timeout for gunmetal. Ahhh it just sounds betchy. The chunky crystals are so damn chic. Collar necklaces are in and making clavicles all around the world look phenom. Pair these with a simple bodycon dress and pretty ankle strap heels -oh shit, bad betch coming through! All you need are some icicles for your hair and raging polar bears to pull you around all night. 

NECKLACE $38 // NASTY GAL // BRACELET $35 

EAR BLING

M.E x J.S M16 Bamboo Earrings

Melody Ehsani $120